12 weeks

I really have trouble starting blogs. I think of so many ways to start them, but all of the introductory lines seem so lame. Oh well. This one is pretty bad already. Regardless of how lame the beginnings may be, I still love to blog and wonder how I forget that I even have one... Oh yeah, it's because I'm so busy doing things off the computer. By the time I get back on it, all my energy and mind powers have been sucked up into the vortex of my home by way of cleaning and keeping up with all the needs of my little one. Who happens to be not so little anymore! I come to learn that if I don't take care of myself, there really isn't any way I'm going to take care of anyone else well. So... I've been trying to live that, and it's very difficult.
I had/have been taking a medicine that would ease my nausea, which by the way has been easing up on its own now! Thank the Lord! Anyway, I noticed a couple of weeks ago while I was taking it regularly, it would give me this sense of... anxiousness. Not a lot, but it's been enough to completely screw up my sleeping schedule. Just yesterday I had to take some medicine because I was feeling really yuck, and by the time I took it, it was still going to be in my system by bedtime. Double yuck. So I was told I could take Tylenol PM, which I did, and it did help me fall asleep. For three measly hours. After that, I was up watching Dirty Jobs and eating sunflower seeds. The other trouble is, I start feeling tired enough to sleep so I go to bed and then I just lay there, tired, but not sleeping, for hours. I can shut my eyes and try not to think of anything, but I will still just lay there awake, for hours.
Yesterday was terrible. I spent most of the day sleeping, or trying to sleep, and puking. I was fortunate that Jerry was also home at the time so I was allowed the luxury of staying in bed, but today... not so much. After only a few hours of sleep, and then maybe another one or two non restful hours of sleep after Jerry left for work this morning... Paul woke up and needed the usual things: a diaper change, love, food, love and some play time. I had energy for.... none of it. But I still did it. I didn't realize how much help I actually needed until I almost passed out while making us breakfast. That was scary. I had him in his highchair at the time so he could watch me make food, so it was like I had a temporary babysitter once I had to put my head between my knees and lay down on my bed just a few feet away from his chair. Jerry got done with work a little early today, so I had a little help after he got home. Jerry was worked very hard and could barely move after he got home and finally sat down, poor man :(
Fun facts: Paul loves cereal and has shared most of it with the floor.
The cat hates Paul and runs away when he gets close to her or he shrieks at her.
Paul is walking more and more on his own! Even while drinking from a bottle!!
Sometimes I think I can feel my tiny baby bounce around inside :)

I would like to add more to this post. I actually had high hopes to have so much more in it, but... Ugh. I'm starting to feel tired and sick. AGAIN... so I'm going to go lay down and maybe add more in the wee morning hours.
~love~